mentally rough.

My depression has kicked in some and isn't helping me with the whole weight loss.

1. I'm not desiring going to the gym as much. I love the gym, I love the feeling...but getting there just sounds dreadful. Now do not get me wrong, besides today I have still been going to the gym but I haven't been excited about it. My depression makes it to where all I want to do is sleep and mope around. Today was even more rough because it was my day off and it was rainy/dreary outside. I ended up asking Andrew to come home from work early. Since he is and was able to without getting in trouble, he did. We took the dogs for a walk (thankfully the rain subsided momentarily) and it did make me feel better. Then we went to Petco, Target, Hy-vee, and Whole Foods (Trader Joe's closes at 9PM and we didn't make it in time) for healthy foods and necessities. It helped quite a bit getting out and not laying around. Grateful for him, he is always there for me and trying to help me with this process.

2. All I want to eat is crap. I want fast food and junk food and trying hard to sustain from it all but it's proven very, very difficult. I know the truth too, I know that your diet trumps exercise.

But my poor eating habits are slowly creeping back and it's affecting my weight loss. I'm still losing but way slower than I could be, and should be with all the exercise I've added. So I'm honestly considering seeing a nutritionist. I need to be more educated on what I should be eating, when, how...all of it. For me I believe I would follow a program or be better off with guidance by someone who knows all about nutrition. But I refuse to take any form of diet pills. I am doing this the old fashion way, with hard work and dedication.

3.

I really need to remember this. I'm focusing so much on results and it's honestly kinda bumming me out. I get mad that I've only lost a pound in a week when I work my butt off in the gym. Mad I only lost half an inch off my waist in two weeks but then lose an 1 3/4" off my chest? Makes me so annoyed! But why?? Honestly I'm still losing and I'm feeling better. Why do I not focus on how I feel than the results? I need to change my state of mind, for sure.

Well tomorrow is a new day. Time to move on, forget the past, focus on progress, and be happy.